Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Shalom: Guidance for Family Leadership, By Kevin McClain

I am a family man. I exercise my Leadership responsibilities first and foremost in my family. My bride and I have 5 children between the ages of 12 and 3. You can imagine that my home is an active one, with multiple pressing needs and (more often than not) opposing desires. Someone wants to go to the pool, while another wants to go to the park, someone won’t share, someone was here first! Often, after a long day, my bride and I are at our wits end. Is it even possible to balance the needs of each member of a family? Isn't that what leadership should be able to do- to facilitate a fair decision, one that brings a sense of balance?

“Balance” is one way to think about the practice of leadership. Like its synonyms “fairness” and “equality” it communicates a sense of right order and justice. I like order and I like justice. However, it has been my experience that if think of my Leadership role as one of restoring “balance,” I find I am typically left out of the picture until there is major disagreement and things are getting serious. Then, there are many voices competing for my support! It makes leadership being a referee, or a contest judge who must cast the decisive vote. It seems inevitable that some are going to get what they want and others are going to be disappointed. We cannot make everyone happy! To my children, the difficult decisions that I had to make rarely looks “balanced” and “fair,” and they let me know. I share their frustration and am tempted to despair and be resentful. So “Balance” as a goal of Leadership fails to serve me and my family well. It is too black and white in a world that is more often than not multiple shades of gray.

Instead of “balanced” or “fair” I have adopted the concept of Shalom to inform my Leadership. Shalom is a Hebrew word used by the Old Testament prophets and is typically translated into English as “peace.” But Shalom is something more than peace. A better translation is “flourishing.” Peace communicates the end of fighting. I certainly don't like my kids to fight. But sometimes peace is pursued rather reluctantly, more for the avoidance of mutual destruction. I find there is very little security and rest in such a peace, as it’s so tentative. It leaves me with a fear and dread that fighting will break out again at any moment, especially the moment I let down my guard. There is little joy in this kind of peace, only a tired resignation.

“Flourishing,” however, conveys the notion of working for the good, for the benefit, for the joy of each person, as an individual, and for the good of all. Instead of working to avoid mutual destruction, we pursue mutual delight. This is a much harder goal to communicate and strive for, but it has been my experience that the goal of Shalom helps me embrace, or “lean into,” my Leadership role. I want my children to experience joy. I want my family to flourish. And when I properly exercise Leadership skills, I contribute directly to their flourishing. I am slowly learning how to practice Shalom. It is my hope that casting a vision of Shalom will serve my children well. It is my hope that they will see their circumstances differently and “lean into” their relationships with their siblings, working for mutual joy.

Author:
Kevin R. McClain
Web & Technology Coordinator
The University of North Carolina at Greensboro (UNCG)

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Values and Leadership, By Preston Yarborough

Values shape how we see our world and how we define the worth of our experiences. When I think back on special moments, I recall a day during my final semester of college when I’d invited my father to join my class. I wanted him to come because my thesis was selected for presentation to the graduating seniors in the English department.

I don’t remember what the paper was about; but I can remember exactly where Dad sat in the audience. I clearly recall how proud he was and how good it felt to have pleased him. It felt special to be recognized among my peers for a project I’d worked hard to complete. I wasn’t the smartest in my class—not even by some margin! Even so, my professor thought my paper was one of the top three.

Why does this experience stand so boldly in my memory? For one, family is a key value of mine. I was representing not only myself, but also my family. Any accolades I received were shared with my Dad; and through him, the rest of my family. That was special. Education and gaining the respect from my peers was important too. Through much of my undergraduate career I wasn’t sure if I belonged. I wondered if I was smart enough. I was surrounded by people who seemed much more prepared and more “at home” with college. When presenting my paper I’d proven to myself that I was competent, but I’m also competitive. It felt good to distinguish myself among an esteemed group of scholars.

The bold words in the paragraph above represent core values that are important to me. These values helped motivate me, guide me, and provided me the courage and persistence to accomplish my personal goal.

Think back over the past year or two and jot a brief list of your personal highlights. Consider things you’ve accomplished or helped others accomplish, things you’ve seen that made an impression on you, or people that impacted your life. Review your list and consider why you chose those particular people or episodes. What made them special? Give it a close look and you’ll find significant clues about your values.

Your values will help shape your leadership. Successful leaders are willing to sacrifice, to push through obstacles, and persist when others say they should quit. If you can’t find a cause that has value (there’s that word again), then you’ll be more inclined to give up.

Author:
Preston Yarborough, Ph.D.
Assistant Director of Leadership
The University of North Carolina at Greensboro (UNCG)

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Managing Relationships, Task and Process, By Katelyn Chapman

Do you feel conflict between managing relationships, getting the task done, and/or deciding on the process? Some people tend to be more task-oriented- thinking “I just want to do it. Why should we talk about HOW we are going to do it?” While others have more concern for people and are relational-oriented- thinking “Is everyone involved? How are we accommodating each other’s needs?” Still others are process-oriented- thinking “How are we going to do this? We need a specific plan of what’s going on before we do anything.”

The Leadership Triangle identifies three aspects of any activity- (1) Task, (2) Process, (3) Relational.

What’s the Task? It’s the goal or what you’re trying to get done. For example, when trying to complete a high ropes course, your task is to physically complete the course. What tasks can you think of?

What’s the Process? It’s how you went about completing the task… Did you plan how you were going to climb the course or did you just go for it? If you just went for it, you most likely tend to be more “task-oriented.” Did you discuss it with everyone involved? Did everyone equally participate in the planning? Were the key stakeholders involved? What are the consequences of planning or not planning? Is there a penalty or risk if you do it wrong?

What’s the Relational? The people in your activity! Are people invited to contribute their thoughts/ideas? What’s the dynamic among group members? How are people’s needs being met?

How do you incorporate these 3 elements to get results? GREAT question! What do you think and why? I suggest you identify where you are within the triangle for a specific situation. Now that you are aware of your position, do you need to shift to incorporate another aspect more?

Another suggestion is to recognize when activities tend to shift to one aspect. For example, when an activity is a competition, what tends to happen? People generally become extremely task-oriented and may do so at the jeopardy of the people (relational) and not use the most effective process. When do people become more relational? A possibility is if someone has something in their personal life that’s a serious concern- i.e. sickness or death in the family.

The key to remember is that where you want to be in the triangle depends on the situation. By better managing relationships, task and process, your results will be improved!

Author:
Katelyn Chapman
Leadership Graduate Assistant
The University of North Carolina at Greensboro (UNCG)

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Getting Your Team on the Same Page, By Katelyn Chapman

Are you part of a new team at school or work? Here are some six tips for getting your team on the same page and increasing your chances of a successful outcome. I invite you to review these tips and then ask yourself what hinders you from putting these into action… You know you should “Get Ready, Aim, and Fire” but are you just firing?

1. Build social capital- Understand each other (name, role in organization, strengths/weaknesses, etc.). By providing open space for individuals to candidly discuss their strengths and weaknesses, the team gains an invaluable understanding of each other. The team will then be able to leverage each other’s strengths.


2. Identify a shared vision- Every business needs a vision (where you want to go) as part of their long-term or “strategic plan,” so what’s different for a team? Nothing! Teams also need this glue to align interests, making sure that everyone is aiming for the same end result. Please note the importance of having input from every member at this stage, so everyone feels a part of the end result and knows they contributed. What happens if a team doesn’t have this shared vision? Say you are part of a team and three members think the end goal is to get a project completed for 20 people, whereas others think it’s for 200 people. The members will have different perspectives of what is “right and wrong” for the group. This shared view also helps the members of the group who are “bigger picture” thinkers.


3. Identify roles that best fit individual’s strengths/ weaknesses. By engaging people, they will be more directly involved, and therefore form a stronger bond with the team. This can also help individuals identify themselves as a leader. If an individual does not volunteer for a position but you see leadership potential, you can say, “You seem to have a lot of leadership potential.” The use of this coaching has been suggested by the Leadership Identity Development Model as a way to help move individuals through the different stages of leadership development.

4. Identify meeting times- Is there a regular time/place that works for everyone so people can have a predictable time?


5. Construct a time-line- Set sequential goals that will help you get to the end result. This will help shape your big picture idea and especially accommodate the detailed-oriented team members. This will also serve as an ongoing communication tool- expressing the status of the different project tasks.


6. Identify “Rules of Engagement”- What are the consequences for tasks not being completed? In my most successful group projects for business and academics, we agreed when tasks would be completed, how they would be submitted, and consequences. When people know they will be held accountable for something, they will be more likely to not put your project/team on the back burner. This serves as a preventative step to those DISASTER TEAMS, and something you can use as a “check in” during the duration of the project.

Author: Katelyn Chapman

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Choose Your Challenge, By Katelyn Chapman

“Here, we do ‘challenge by choice.’” Does that sound familiar? Choice Philosophy helps give participants a sense of control, assuring that they have the final decision on what they are and are not comfortable with, hence promoting their emotional safety. At The University of North Carolina at Greensboro (UNCG) Team QUEST, we steer away from the ‘challenge by choice,’ and incorporate ‘choose your challenge.’ This twist of words encourages the positive possibilities rather than giving the participant an opt-out perspective.

As facilitators, how do we know the fine-line between coaching someone to push their comfort zone and jeopardizing the choice philosophy? It’s important for us to read when participants merely need a little encouragement from the other participants or us. Or, is the group encouraging them excessively and the possibility of negative peer pressure exists?

We were talking about this the other day at UNCG Team QUEST and the Director told a story, “I had this girl that was adamantly afraid of the high ropes…I talked her through it. At the end, she embraced me and said, ‘Thank you so much. I could never have done it without you.’” My first reaction to myself was “Oh that’s so nice!” As I thought that, she said, “And I thought, OH NO! We are not here to make someone feel dependent on us. If they feel they couldn’t have done it on their own, then how will they be empowered next time that happens? Sometimes, the best learning comes when people don’t complete something successfully, and then after they wish they had done it. Next time they have an opportunity, they won’t pass it by.” Then, I had an Ah Ha moment! It made sense, but why didn’t I ever think about it from that perspective? I believe the human element of selfishness can get in the way. As facilitators, we tend to want our group to ‘be successful’ by completing the element. Now there’s some food for thought…

Author:
Katelyn Chapman
Leadership Graduate Assistant
The University of North Carolina at Greensboro (UNCG)